Some of you are aware that I am in the process of applying to PhD programs (Hence the increase in blog posts, better than actually working). Well, for a couple of the programs I am looking at, I missed qualifying with my GRE scores by 10 lousy points. So I have to take the GRE again.
TO THE TUNE OF $140.00
Yes, that is right, I just signed up to retake the exam and my pocket book is hurting. I also think I need to reschedule it because I signed up for an 8 am test. What was I thinking? But the next best option is 4 pm on Christmas Eve...
The crap I do without even the guarantee of a positive outcome...
***UPDATE***
So I went and rescheduled the exam, for December 24 at 12:00pm. Yes, that's right, Christmas Eve. And I paid $50 for the privilege.
sigh - why didn't I catch that taking an exam at 8 am is a bad idea for me in the first place and save myself some money. !@#$*&^*
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Friday, November 28, 2008
Thursday, November 27, 2008
*sigh*
So, today is thanksgiving. Little "t" because as someone who studies systems of oppression, this day is very problematic, for many reasons. For a brief articulation of part of this problem, check out my cousin Jefferson's blog here.
This year is especially troubling to me because of a conversation I had yesterday at work.
The conversation started out great, there is another student who's research interests align with mine and we had a great conversation about racial stereotypes. Then a third coworker jumped in. This is where the conversation fell apart. I don't have the energy to write about everything that happened but here are a couple excerpts of her highly offensive and racist comments.
During a conversation explaining the difference between using the term Asian and Oriental:
her: I just don't see it. I've read a lot of literature and Oriental has never seemed negative to me.
That's the whole point you moron. It is presented as something non-offensive when in fact it is. Literature, especially main stream literature continues to perpetuate this term as acceptable as a form of dominant hegemonic ideology. Me: Well, that's literature.
Later, after the conversation had shifted to the use of derogatory terms and their connotations:
Me: It's like using the term, 'I've been gyped.'
Her: I don't know what that refers to.
Me: That's okay, a lot of people don't. Gyp is a shorten version of Gypsy. It is referring to the fact that Gypsies are seen as thieves, liars, cheats and dishonest.
Her: Well, compared to our culture, they are.
Me: OMG!
(not my inside voice)
...
I left the office shortly after that, really worked up and super angry. Such blatant racism. I have so rarely run into it face to face that it is a shock to the system. I am use to covert forms of racism (also not acceptable), but this... And she didn't even realize how racist she was being, but that's white privilege for you. And I have to take a class with her next semester. Someone will have to hold me back if she says stupid stuff during this class. Our common class? Feminist Perspectives.
Her other class? Intercultural Communication.
I am very glad that I already took that class so I can miss her contributions to those discussions. I imagine they would go something like the conversation that occurred yesterday.
This year is especially troubling to me because of a conversation I had yesterday at work.
The conversation started out great, there is another student who's research interests align with mine and we had a great conversation about racial stereotypes. Then a third coworker jumped in. This is where the conversation fell apart. I don't have the energy to write about everything that happened but here are a couple excerpts of her highly offensive and racist comments.
During a conversation explaining the difference between using the term Asian and Oriental:
her: I just don't see it. I've read a lot of literature and Oriental has never seemed negative to me.
That's the whole point you moron. It is presented as something non-offensive when in fact it is. Literature, especially main stream literature continues to perpetuate this term as acceptable as a form of dominant hegemonic ideology. Me: Well, that's literature.
Later, after the conversation had shifted to the use of derogatory terms and their connotations:
Me: It's like using the term, 'I've been gyped.'
Her: I don't know what that refers to.
Me: That's okay, a lot of people don't. Gyp is a shorten version of Gypsy. It is referring to the fact that Gypsies are seen as thieves, liars, cheats and dishonest.
Her: Well, compared to our culture, they are.
Me: OMG!
(not my inside voice)
...
I left the office shortly after that, really worked up and super angry. Such blatant racism. I have so rarely run into it face to face that it is a shock to the system. I am use to covert forms of racism (also not acceptable), but this... And she didn't even realize how racist she was being, but that's white privilege for you. And I have to take a class with her next semester. Someone will have to hold me back if she says stupid stuff during this class. Our common class? Feminist Perspectives.
Her other class? Intercultural Communication.
I am very glad that I already took that class so I can miss her contributions to those discussions. I imagine they would go something like the conversation that occurred yesterday.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Sounds of November
Very busy right now, trying to finish up school, just got back from a major conference in San Diego, working on my thesis and trying to apply to PhD programs all at the same time. With finals rapidly approaching, i usually make myself a CD to get through the week (entitled Finals FA 08). Here is the playlist currently helping me get through all this:
1. Intro from Pretty Good Year 2006 (Party Girl Presents)
2. Into the Void - NIN
3. Nothing Fails [Nevins Mix] - Madonna
4. Possession - Sarah McLachlan
5. Devil Inside - INXS
6. Sick - Sneakerpimps
7. She's Your Cocaine - Tori Amos
8. Elderly Woman Behind the Counter in a Small Town - Pearl Jam
9. Marianne - Tori Amos
10. I Kissed a Girl - Katy Perry
11. I Dare You to Move - Switchfoot
12. Everything's Not Lost - Coldplay
13. Ain't No Other Man - Christina Aguilera
14. Candyman - Christina Aguilera
15. Move Your Feet - Junior Senior
I know, pretty random. Some songs were selected at random by Party Shuffle. Others have been stuck in my head for a while, so what can you do?
Hope your tunes are jamming too and keeping your feet moving through the last few months of 2008.
Friday, November 07, 2008
Having a Nutty
I have been trying really hard to stop venting what ever comes to my mind when ever I read something that annoys me. Unfortunately, I have not been that successful in not 'having a nutty' as I like to call it.
Most recent nutty? This morning, I received a pretty condescending email from the department secretary telling all the faculty that they need to clean their leftovers out of the fridge so it doesn't smell.
Now, I know it is not directed completely at me, but I could not help myself. I hate been spoken to like I am a child. There is no need to take that tone. And I tried to figure out why I reacted that way after my rant in the faculty office and that's what I came up with. Now if I can just work through my reaction before I actually have my nutty, that would be progress.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Oh Hai....
Still alive, not burned in the slightest, just really, really busy. Hopefully can post in a couple weeks.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Fun Stuff
One of those online quizzes. This one was What religion should you be?
You Should Follow Judaism |
 You believe that there is only one God, but you don't get too dogmatic about it. Instead, you simply try to live the most ethical life you can. Religious holidays and cultural identity are very important to you. You enjoy following religious traditions and find meaning in them. |
This 'n That
I took this morning off from work, so thought that I would post some of the thoughts I have had in the last few weeks.
********************************************************
Last night for the second time, a clerk in a store talked to me in Spanish. The first time, the clerk apologized, stating she was on autopilot. I guess my blank stare was a tip off that I barely understood her. Last night, the clerk spoke to me in Spanish the entire time. I thought I greeted her in English but... Luckily, sales transactions are simple enough that I can generally follow what the clerks are saying.
I don't know how I feel about this. On one hand, I am proud to be thought of as a fluent Spanish speaker. On the other hand, aren't the clerks making a snap decision based upon my physical appearance?
***********************************************
_-_model_pic_1.jpg)
Last night, I finally found a dress to wear to the wedding I will be attending this weekend.
I cannot believe it, the old gang will be together again! It has been a long time since we had one of our potluck dinners together. I miss them all, T3, Meesh, Ms. B, Ms. S, BJ & Chrispy. Now we have the addition of two partners as well. (Is the plural of spouses, spice?) Why is it as we get older, it is so hard to gather a group of people together? And we are not even that old! Between exhausting jobs, commuting, heavy school loads for three of us, and two people living out of town... it makes me sad. I use to organize these dinners because these people are important to me and I wanted to be sure that I got to see them at least once a month. I never thought that was too much to ask. But the dinners kept getting further & further apart until there were only 4 people involved.
I am super excited and glad that we are seeing each other for a happy occasion. We will have to be sure to get a picture of all of us, the original gang.
***********************************************
All the media and multiple bloggers are talking about Sarah Palin. (if you missed the SNL opening skit this last weekend, you have to see it. It was great). I have only this to say and then I will post no more on this topic.
I am sick to death of all the media reports and articles that state women are flocking to the Republican party just because they have a female candidate. Hello! Where were all these reports when Hillary was running? Is our society really that backwards that we vote solely based on gender? Really? I mean, REALLY? I believe in gender equality, the same society rules that constrain women also constrain men and transgendered individuals. If we truly believe in gender equality as a nation, a candidate's gender should make no difference, we should be voting on their qualifications as a leader and on their stances on the issues. That being said, I am not happy about ANY of our choices for U.S. President or V.P. There were better choices.
********************************************************
Last night for the second time, a clerk in a store talked to me in Spanish. The first time, the clerk apologized, stating she was on autopilot. I guess my blank stare was a tip off that I barely understood her. Last night, the clerk spoke to me in Spanish the entire time. I thought I greeted her in English but... Luckily, sales transactions are simple enough that I can generally follow what the clerks are saying. I don't know how I feel about this. On one hand, I am proud to be thought of as a fluent Spanish speaker. On the other hand, aren't the clerks making a snap decision based upon my physical appearance?
***********************************************
_-_model_pic_1.jpg)
Last night, I finally found a dress to wear to the wedding I will be attending this weekend. I cannot believe it, the old gang will be together again! It has been a long time since we had one of our potluck dinners together. I miss them all, T3, Meesh, Ms. B, Ms. S, BJ & Chrispy. Now we have the addition of two partners as well. (Is the plural of spouses, spice?) Why is it as we get older, it is so hard to gather a group of people together? And we are not even that old! Between exhausting jobs, commuting, heavy school loads for three of us, and two people living out of town... it makes me sad. I use to organize these dinners because these people are important to me and I wanted to be sure that I got to see them at least once a month. I never thought that was too much to ask. But the dinners kept getting further & further apart until there were only 4 people involved.
I am super excited and glad that we are seeing each other for a happy occasion. We will have to be sure to get a picture of all of us, the original gang.
***********************************************
All the media and multiple bloggers are talking about Sarah Palin. (if you missed the SNL opening skit this last weekend, you have to see it. It was great). I have only this to say and then I will post no more on this topic.I am sick to death of all the media reports and articles that state women are flocking to the Republican party just because they have a female candidate. Hello! Where were all these reports when Hillary was running? Is our society really that backwards that we vote solely based on gender? Really? I mean, REALLY? I believe in gender equality, the same society rules that constrain women also constrain men and transgendered individuals. If we truly believe in gender equality as a nation, a candidate's gender should make no difference, we should be voting on their qualifications as a leader and on their stances on the issues. That being said, I am not happy about ANY of our choices for U.S. President or V.P. There were better choices.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Oh, By the way
The
"
that time forgot" in town now has the "clerk that time forgot".
Some of you know what I mean...
"
that time forgot" in town now has the "clerk that time forgot".
Some of you know what I mean...
Saturday, September 06, 2008
In brief
Can you limp on both legs?
Yesterday:
Awake - 22 hours
On campus working - 19 hours
On my feet walking and climbing stairs - 12 hours straight
Everything aches from the knee down and I have the feeling that it will be worse tomorrow. Dropped 2.5 pounds in 2 days; don't feel dehydrated and I know what that feels like. Went to bed at 3 but work up at 6:30 today, fully functioning. I will allow myself to nap whenever and am taking Tylenol for legs.
More later.
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Stealing from Christa, Part II
Googlrific
1: Type in "[your name] needs" in the Google search:
M needs... to tell him what really happened, but will he listen? ...
first picture that came up when I google image searched my name that wasn't a half naked super model
2: Type in "[your name] looks like" in Google search:
M looks like she got her chin on a "buy one, get three free" deal
Strange enough, this entry came from some one describing this entry.
3: Type in "[your name] does" in Google search:
What does the name M mean? M, which is a variant of Maria, is Latin-derived and means: star of the sea.
4: Type in "[your name] hates" in Google search:
M|Hates|You|@|The|Lemonade|Diaries...and everywhere else too ...
5: Type in "[your name] goes" or "..has gone" in Google search
M goes on the date ... from Hell!
6: Type in "[your name] loves" in Google search:
MySpace profile for M Love with pictures, videos, personal blog, interests, information about me and more.
7: Type in "[your name] eats" in Google search:
M Eats Efferdent by m :] Watch it on MySpace Videos.
8: Type in "[your name] has" in Google search:
MySpace profile for M has a car. with pictures, videos, personal blog, interests, information about me and more.
9: Type in "[your name] wants" in Google search:
Jul 28, 2008 ... M's wants board to hear the music. In the eyes of M's Ristorante owner Attilio Marini, there's nothing unsuitable about a disc ...
Runner up because it is supper funny: M begging for some "chon chon" ... Choose the language ... [You Tube Video]
A: Christa has the best stuff on her blog
B: Damn MySpace... a lot of the answers came from there. Bleh!
1: Type in "[your name] needs" in the Google search:
M needs... to tell him what really happened, but will he listen? ...
first picture that came up when I google image searched my name that wasn't a half naked super model
2: Type in "[your name] looks like" in Google search:
M looks like she got her chin on a "buy one, get three free" deal
Strange enough, this entry came from some one describing this entry.
3: Type in "[your name] does" in Google search:
What does the name M mean? M, which is a variant of Maria, is Latin-derived and means: star of the sea.
4: Type in "[your name] hates" in Google search:
M|Hates|You|@|The|Lemonade|Diaries...and everywhere else too ...
5: Type in "[your name] goes" or "..has gone" in Google search
M goes on the date ... from Hell!
6: Type in "[your name] loves" in Google search:
MySpace profile for M Love with pictures, videos, personal blog, interests, information about me and more.
7: Type in "[your name] eats" in Google search:
M Eats Efferdent by m :] Watch it on MySpace Videos.
8: Type in "[your name] has" in Google search:
MySpace profile for M has a car. with pictures, videos, personal blog, interests, information about me and more.
9: Type in "[your name] wants" in Google search:
Jul 28, 2008 ... M's wants board to hear the music. In the eyes of M's Ristorante owner Attilio Marini, there's nothing unsuitable about a disc ...
Runner up because it is supper funny: M begging for some "chon chon" ... Choose the language ... [You Tube Video]
A: Christa has the best stuff on her blog
B: Damn MySpace... a lot of the answers came from there. Bleh!
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
2nd day of school
I am apparently very excited for the start of school, I woke up before my alarm, and I mean before 5 am early, both yesterday and today. I have no idea what that is really about. But since i am awake, i have been getting up and getting to school by 7 a.m. This has given me 2 hours to work on stuff before I have to start work but left me exhausted on Monday night. I went home with my legs killing me and couldn't figure out why until I realized I am not used to standing in heels for 2 hours straight anymore. I'll get use to it again soon, about two weeks I realize.
Highlights today
*Had lunch with someone from another office today. Awkward conversation but yummy salad from a new place on campus.
*Got to start a phone conversation with, "Ewww! I have chicken!" today. Sweet.
*Visited with big bro and dad today, three of us on campus at once! Awesome!
*Had a fantastic meeting with my adviser and got all jazzed to work on my thesis. Then left the book I needed to read at work and lost my motivation. Oh well, I will work on it tomorrow. 2 pages before I come home! (I'm at about 1/2 a page right now).
*Got to show my big bro my office today and skip the really long line in the bookstore to buy new books.
Got to go to bed. Nite-nite.
Highlights today
*Had lunch with someone from another office today. Awkward conversation but yummy salad from a new place on campus.
*Got to start a phone conversation with, "Ewww! I have chicken!" today. Sweet.
*Visited with big bro and dad today, three of us on campus at once! Awesome!
*Had a fantastic meeting with my adviser and got all jazzed to work on my thesis. Then left the book I needed to read at work and lost my motivation. Oh well, I will work on it tomorrow. 2 pages before I come home! (I'm at about 1/2 a page right now).
*Got to show my big bro my office today and skip the really long line in the bookstore to buy new books.
Got to go to bed. Nite-nite.
Monday, August 25, 2008
First Day of School
Ah, it is so easy to spot the freshmen. They are the ones who stop and ask me if a 100 room number is on the first floor...
Ah, newbies...
Survived my first class, a bit of a mess and didn't get everything done.
Ah, newbies...
Survived my first class, a bit of a mess and didn't get everything done.
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Friday, August 08, 2008
Stealing from Christa
Just for fun, Christa Shared this link and I took the test too.
You are The High Priestess
Science, Wisdom, Knowledge, Education.
The High Priestess is the card of knowledge, instinctual, supernatural, secret knowledge. She holds scrolls of arcane information that she might, or might not reveal to you. The moon crown on her head as well as the crescent by her foot indicates her willingness to illuminate what you otherwise might not see, reveal the secrets you need to know. The High Priestess is also associated with the moon however and can also indicate change or fluxuation, particularily when it comes to your moods.
What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Rising Costs
Not groceries or gas but school.
I started looking into PhD programs this month, seriously looking into them and I know I shouldn't, but I keep looking at what it is going to cost me. California has one of the lowest costs to attend college and since I am a residence, I am in an even lower cost bracket.
By attending Cal State Universities for both my B.A. and M.A., I figure that each of my degrees cost about $10,000.
Now in contrast, for one year at a couple of the universities I have been looking at:
$9,481 UC Irvine
$9,670 UCLA
$10,178/$14,336 UT Austin (depends on number of units)
$11,198 UC Santa Cruz
$21,714 Univ. of Illinois, Urbana-Champaign
$29,661 Northwestern University
$33,836 USC
Most PhD programs offer full funding for their students, which is part of the reason it is so competitive but still....jeez a lou!
So that is part of the reason I have been so distracted and not posting lately. I have a lot on my mind.
I started looking into PhD programs this month, seriously looking into them and I know I shouldn't, but I keep looking at what it is going to cost me. California has one of the lowest costs to attend college and since I am a residence, I am in an even lower cost bracket.
By attending Cal State Universities for both my B.A. and M.A., I figure that each of my degrees cost about $10,000.
Now in contrast, for one year at a couple of the universities I have been looking at:
$9,481 UC Irvine
$9,670 UCLA
$10,178/$14,336 UT Austin (depends on number of units)
$11,198 UC Santa Cruz
$21,714 Univ. of Illinois, Urbana-Champaign
$29,661 Northwestern University
$33,836 USC
Most PhD programs offer full funding for their students, which is part of the reason it is so competitive but still....jeez a lou!
So that is part of the reason I have been so distracted and not posting lately. I have a lot on my mind.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
How I Have Been Spending My Time
I am having a blast in NV. Here is what the last few days have been like, in no particular order:
Lots of Napping
A trip to Sonic
Slowly, very slowly reading for my class this summer. Should finish article #3 tonight and that means I have to/want to finish 4 tomorrow. I plan to get up at my regular time and read my heart out. It is getting a little better with each article. Now I just have to write up everything I have read as well...
An afternoon movie
Rock Band! My new obsession! For this game alone I would buy a playstation 3.
I sang, played the drums (horribly - not my strong suit) and played the bass guitar.
No actual pics from our game but the above one is a bit like our drummer, Quinn. My bass player had a bright pink Joan jet cut for the majority of the game until I mixed it up and ended up with a shag cut that was half bright teal and half moss green, very fetching. So much fun and so much harder than it looks. Especially when I realize that I don't know the majority of the songs and the ones I do know, I don't know as well as I think I did. although I have to say, this game is easier than the Magic mic that I used Wednesday night at work.
Speaking of, I better get to bed, er...read some more before I settle in for the night. One more day, que triste! I am a little nervous about the flight home but bought some less drowsy(WTF!) Dramamine to be on the safe side. Fingers Crossed!
Lots of Napping
A trip to Sonic
Slowly, very slowly reading for my class this summer. Should finish article #3 tonight and that means I have to/want to finish 4 tomorrow. I plan to get up at my regular time and read my heart out. It is getting a little better with each article. Now I just have to write up everything I have read as well...
An afternoon movie
Rock Band! My new obsession! For this game alone I would buy a playstation 3.
I sang, played the drums (horribly - not my strong suit) and played the bass guitar. 
No actual pics from our game but the above one is a bit like our drummer, Quinn. My bass player had a bright pink Joan jet cut for the majority of the game until I mixed it up and ended up with a shag cut that was half bright teal and half moss green, very fetching. So much fun and so much harder than it looks. Especially when I realize that I don't know the majority of the songs and the ones I do know, I don't know as well as I think I did. although I have to say, this game is easier than the Magic mic that I used Wednesday night at work. Speaking of, I better get to bed, er...read some more before I settle in for the night. One more day, que triste! I am a little nervous about the flight home but bought some less drowsy(WTF!) Dramamine to be on the safe side. Fingers Crossed!
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