Some of you are aware that I am in the process of applying to PhD programs (Hence the increase in blog posts, better than actually working). Well, for a couple of the programs I am looking at, I missed qualifying with my GRE scores by 10 lousy points. So I have to take the GRE again.
TO THE TUNE OF $140.00
Yes, that is right, I just signed up to retake the exam and my pocket book is hurting. I also think I need to reschedule it because I signed up for an 8 am test. What was I thinking? But the next best option is 4 pm on Christmas Eve...
The crap I do without even the guarantee of a positive outcome...
***UPDATE***
So I went and rescheduled the exam, for December 24 at 12:00pm. Yes, that's right, Christmas Eve. And I paid $50 for the privilege.
sigh - why didn't I catch that taking an exam at 8 am is a bad idea for me in the first place and save myself some money. !@#$*&^*
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Friday, November 28, 2008
Thursday, November 27, 2008
*sigh*
So, today is thanksgiving. Little "t" because as someone who studies systems of oppression, this day is very problematic, for many reasons. For a brief articulation of part of this problem, check out my cousin Jefferson's blog here.
This year is especially troubling to me because of a conversation I had yesterday at work.
The conversation started out great, there is another student who's research interests align with mine and we had a great conversation about racial stereotypes. Then a third coworker jumped in. This is where the conversation fell apart. I don't have the energy to write about everything that happened but here are a couple excerpts of her highly offensive and racist comments.
During a conversation explaining the difference between using the term Asian and Oriental:
her: I just don't see it. I've read a lot of literature and Oriental has never seemed negative to me.
That's the whole point you moron. It is presented as something non-offensive when in fact it is. Literature, especially main stream literature continues to perpetuate this term as acceptable as a form of dominant hegemonic ideology. Me: Well, that's literature.
Later, after the conversation had shifted to the use of derogatory terms and their connotations:
Me: It's like using the term, 'I've been gyped.'
Her: I don't know what that refers to.
Me: That's okay, a lot of people don't. Gyp is a shorten version of Gypsy. It is referring to the fact that Gypsies are seen as thieves, liars, cheats and dishonest.
Her: Well, compared to our culture, they are.
Me: OMG!
(not my inside voice)
...
I left the office shortly after that, really worked up and super angry. Such blatant racism. I have so rarely run into it face to face that it is a shock to the system. I am use to covert forms of racism (also not acceptable), but this... And she didn't even realize how racist she was being, but that's white privilege for you. And I have to take a class with her next semester. Someone will have to hold me back if she says stupid stuff during this class. Our common class? Feminist Perspectives.
Her other class? Intercultural Communication.
I am very glad that I already took that class so I can miss her contributions to those discussions. I imagine they would go something like the conversation that occurred yesterday.
This year is especially troubling to me because of a conversation I had yesterday at work.
The conversation started out great, there is another student who's research interests align with mine and we had a great conversation about racial stereotypes. Then a third coworker jumped in. This is where the conversation fell apart. I don't have the energy to write about everything that happened but here are a couple excerpts of her highly offensive and racist comments.
During a conversation explaining the difference between using the term Asian and Oriental:
her: I just don't see it. I've read a lot of literature and Oriental has never seemed negative to me.
That's the whole point you moron. It is presented as something non-offensive when in fact it is. Literature, especially main stream literature continues to perpetuate this term as acceptable as a form of dominant hegemonic ideology. Me: Well, that's literature.
Later, after the conversation had shifted to the use of derogatory terms and their connotations:
Me: It's like using the term, 'I've been gyped.'
Her: I don't know what that refers to.
Me: That's okay, a lot of people don't. Gyp is a shorten version of Gypsy. It is referring to the fact that Gypsies are seen as thieves, liars, cheats and dishonest.
Her: Well, compared to our culture, they are.
Me: OMG!
(not my inside voice)
...
I left the office shortly after that, really worked up and super angry. Such blatant racism. I have so rarely run into it face to face that it is a shock to the system. I am use to covert forms of racism (also not acceptable), but this... And she didn't even realize how racist she was being, but that's white privilege for you. And I have to take a class with her next semester. Someone will have to hold me back if she says stupid stuff during this class. Our common class? Feminist Perspectives.
Her other class? Intercultural Communication.
I am very glad that I already took that class so I can miss her contributions to those discussions. I imagine they would go something like the conversation that occurred yesterday.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Sounds of November
Very busy right now, trying to finish up school, just got back from a major conference in San Diego, working on my thesis and trying to apply to PhD programs all at the same time. With finals rapidly approaching, i usually make myself a CD to get through the week (entitled Finals FA 08). Here is the playlist currently helping me get through all this:
1. Intro from Pretty Good Year 2006 (Party Girl Presents)
2. Into the Void - NIN
3. Nothing Fails [Nevins Mix] - Madonna
4. Possession - Sarah McLachlan
5. Devil Inside - INXS
6. Sick - Sneakerpimps
7. She's Your Cocaine - Tori Amos
8. Elderly Woman Behind the Counter in a Small Town - Pearl Jam
9. Marianne - Tori Amos
10. I Kissed a Girl - Katy Perry
11. I Dare You to Move - Switchfoot
12. Everything's Not Lost - Coldplay
13. Ain't No Other Man - Christina Aguilera
14. Candyman - Christina Aguilera
15. Move Your Feet - Junior Senior
I know, pretty random. Some songs were selected at random by Party Shuffle. Others have been stuck in my head for a while, so what can you do?
Hope your tunes are jamming too and keeping your feet moving through the last few months of 2008.
Friday, November 07, 2008
Having a Nutty
I have been trying really hard to stop venting what ever comes to my mind when ever I read something that annoys me. Unfortunately, I have not been that successful in not 'having a nutty' as I like to call it.
Most recent nutty? This morning, I received a pretty condescending email from the department secretary telling all the faculty that they need to clean their leftovers out of the fridge so it doesn't smell.
Now, I know it is not directed completely at me, but I could not help myself. I hate been spoken to like I am a child. There is no need to take that tone. And I tried to figure out why I reacted that way after my rant in the faculty office and that's what I came up with. Now if I can just work through my reaction before I actually have my nutty, that would be progress.
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