Un beso grande para ti!*

*A big kiss for you!

In honor of Sam and her day of mourning (Yes, I am wearing all black today in solidarity with you), I have decided to share my thoughts on V-day. ‘Cuz I know you all are just dying to know what I think. Well, wait no longer.

Considering that I date about every third blue moon, it comes as no surprise that I have not ever been dating a boy when Valentine’s Day rolled around. And I’m okay with that. Despite my reading habits and choice of movies, I don’t really see myself as a romantic. Look at the traditional Valentine’s day gifts.

Chocolates – I am not a chocolate fan and wouldn’t want to consume the calories. I’m not a freak about my weight but my weight loss of 30 pounds is still fresh in my mind. Plus, I have that whole Weight Watchers lifetime member at goal thing going on. As long as I stay within range of my goal weight, I don’t have to pay for the meetings. That is probably the only thing that keeps me accountable for my weight. Hey, what ever works to keep me at a healthy weight so I don’t get diabetes or heart disease since both run in the family.

Roses – I am not a fan of receiving flowers. Don’t get me wrong, there are beautiful and I love the scent but theoretically, you are receiving a dying plant. Once the stem is cut, the poor plant has limited time left on this earth. Maybe this view is a little weird on my part but who wants to receive a dying plant as a gift. Uh, thanks?

Lingerie – The boy who tries to give me sexy, uncomfortable and skimpy clothes better be prepared to receive a diatribe about the objectification of the female body by dominant Western civilization. News flash, thong underwear is NOT comfortable by any stretch of the imagination. It’s just that panty line is a greater fashion sin.

Perfume – I’m all for a lovely scent that reminds you of your loved one when you are apart. It’s unfortunate that I get migraines from most colognes and perfumes on the market (In particular, I recently found out that By, created by Armani, is not a good scent for me to be around). Plus, I have been subjected to too many people, both men and women, who like to marinate in the stuff.

Jewelry – Umm, yeah. I don’t think any man is going to buy me diamonds. I prefer the semi-precious gems any way. Garnets, sapphires, peridot (my birthstone), and costume jewelry is what I like. I tend to loose my stuff so I don’t want anyone to spend a lot of money on the bling. Colored rhinestones satisfy me.

Stuffed Animals – ‘Cuz I need more crap to cover my bed and to take with me when I move away for Graduate school? No thank you. I have my talking Stitch and my Hula Dancing Stitch and that is all I need to make me smile after a long day.

So if you are thinking, “Geez, Marz, get a grip. It’s just one day a year.” I’ll share what I do like about this day.

Romantic love is a wonderful thing. We are mammals and mammals are social creatures that need to be touched in order to thrive. I think it is wonderful that we have a holiday that is all about cherishing the people in your life who give and receive love from you. I do not feel that this holiday is just for lovers. I think of my immediate and extended family and my friends on this day. Because love is what the holiday is truly about. And it is not a case that I am simply railing against the commercialization of this holiday. We live in a capitalist society, comrade. Going into debt for this holiday is too much but I don’t see anything wrong with a token of your affection.

So what do I think a good gift is?

How about giving a book that touched your life and your heart? I am not talking about one of those, “Chicken Soup for the Soul” churned out crap, but how about a book that changes the way you reflect on life? Share with your loved one and perhaps take a moment to inscribe a thoughtful dedication on the inside cover. Isn’t part of the whole idea of being in a romantic relationship is that you want to share your life with someone? So get sharing! Now that’s a gift.

Instead of killing a flower for a bouquet, how about a trip to a Local Park or display garden? You give the gift of your time and you also are seeing the flowers in their natural habitat. And if you live in California, chances are, the flowers will be blooming this time of year. You know, Thousand Oaks does have the Gardens of the World across from the performing arts center and the Huntington Library is not that far a drive either.

How about instead of buying lingerie or jewelry, make a donation to the American Heart Association or your loved one’s favorite charity? It’s a good way to spend your money and you get a tax write off. Hey, it’s February, love isn’t the only thing people are thinking about this month. Taxes are due sooner than you think. Why not get started on a write off for next year now? The recipient doesn’t need to know that they are helping you get a tax break. Make them think you are supporting a worthwhile cause in their honor.

These are just my thoughts on the day. If you dream of receiving a big bouquet of red roses, more power to you. I’m just not a romantic. Course I say this now, in 2006 as I am single and working on the whole intimacy thing. Who knows how I would feel if I was in a romantic relationship?